Category Archives: Morals

A Snowy Job

I happened across chapter 6 in the book of Job today. From the beginning, I relate to the words. From misery outweighing all the sands of the sea to not having the strength to endure – believe I’ve said I need a strength that is not my own a time or two recently – to feeling deceived by those closest to you. “…when it is swollen with ice and melting snow.” I stop dead in my tracks or snow tracks, perhaps.

I feel the need to sit and gather my thoughts. I pop open my computer and as I begin to let my thoughts trickle out, the lyric of a song playing in the background catches my ear, “to hear sleigh bells in the snow”. My skin prickles. I go back to finish Job chapter 6. He continues to speak to me: “But when the hot weather arrives, the water disappears.” and the travelers become disappointed and their hopes are ‘dashed’ because they were counting on the water. Job talks about his ‘friends’ criticisms being more than just hard to hear honest words. Does that make them ‘right’ and him ‘wrong’?  He’s not sinless, but he has the right values and actions – he turns to God.

“Kindness is like snow, beautifying everything it covers.” One of my favorite verses my 6 year old and I quote is Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and loving to each other…”. It’s typically the daily reminder he receives as he hops out of the car for school each morning. Compassion and empathy towards others and especially those hurting does so much for the human soul – both the giver and receiver.

I’ve talked about my tribe so much recently. I absolutely adore them. They have kind hearts, fierce minds and brave spirits. They, well, this:tribe

All. Day. ❤

So today marks 6 years. Six years since the best man I’ve ever known left this earth early. I got up this morning, surprisingly in good spirits. I selected my outfit and was off to start my day. It was during my car ride I did some reflecting. My dad had a larger than life personality so when that is gone suddenly from your life one day, never to return again – well it makes for a tough life adjustment.

As I was recalling his life and his death, I understand I may not fully get the ‘whys’ of him leaving so early, but the life lessons he’s taught me even in death have been priceless. It was then I realized what I was wearing…collagemaker_20161128_133101_resized

Another snowy moment. Another snowy message. Another snowy lesson. “When snow falls, nature listens.” And I do too. It’s hard to stop imagining life the way we think it should be and let God do work. Job goes through trials and comes out triumphant. Much to learn about faith and perseverance from ole Job – hear those sleigh bells in the snow, if you will.

“So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings.” Time to slay – or ‘sleigh’ 😉

Too Much

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I’ve always been told I have high expectations. I’m too honest. Too loyal. Too strong-willed. My mama always told me to treat other people the way I want to be treated. So I love fiercely, I defend loyally, and I protect with everything that I am. In return, I expect: honesty, loyalty, compassion, empathy, kindness, love. I’m tired of feeling less than and not good enough because of what I expect. How are any of those expectations wrong?

Perhaps that’s the problem with the world. Not enough people expect those things – especially women. We walk around constantly lowering the bar for others. Silly cliches exist because of those low bars, “You’re not the only one.” “It happens all the time.” When will we live in a world where integrity, morals and character matter?

God forbid we be good to each other. Amazing how a simple concept appears to be an impossible task. I am not perfect – I am human which naturally makes me flawed. I fall short every day of the person I really want to be. I make mistakes, but I have a conscience that won’t let me move on without learning from them.

It’s amazing what people will let you think about yourself – especially as a woman. People who say they’re there for you and understand you. Yet when it comes to standing up and making a morally conscious decision, they flake or disappear altogether. What is good is not always right and what is right is not always easy. All of a sudden you’re made to feel worthless and less than, rejected and unloveable.

Well guess what? I’m NONE of those things. I’ve compromised and removed pieces of me for others. THAT is where I went wrong. I choose to take a stand now. Casting shame aside, I choose to make a difference. I have a little boy who WILL see the better way. He may see me fall, but he will see me rise. He will hear me say I’m sorry and take accountability when I’m wrong. He will see me do right by others when I mess up. He will see me love all kinds of people and show compassion when they’re hurting.

We’re here to love. That’s the sole purpose. There’s no big mysterious meaning to this life. It’s all about love. It’s time we get our heads out of our ass and really show up for each other. I may be too much for some, but that just means those in my tribe are fierce as hell. We don’t hide behind false pretenses. We’re real and ugly and silly and beautiful all wrapped in one and we accept that. And if that’s just too much for some to take in, I’m okay with that. I’ll take my ‘too much’ any day over ‘not enough’.